relationships -- random rant

The other day, a friend of mine and I were talking about one topic that excites even the best of us – Relationships.

The conversation made me realize what I feel about relationships in general, which is what this post is all about.

***

Falling in love is one of human’s default settings. Whether we like it or not, most people will sooner or later want to love, and be loved, want and want to be wanted. It’s really nothing to be ashamed off, it’s just how life is.

What’s interesting to me however, is what people do when they’ve caught these feelings.

Some people decide to just dismiss the feeling;

Some decide to stalk their crush through social media;

And some decide to man up (or woman up) to make the first move.

For the people who manned (or woman-ed) up, I think it can either end in 3 ways:

1. A relationship

2. A friendship (also known as friend-zoned)

3. Heartbreak

Personally, I’ve always preferred to foster friendships before going into a relationship with anyone (and heartbreak to not come at all!). There’s no point in having a relationship with someone that you can’t be friends with because hey, there can’t be a boyfriend and girlfriend without ‘friend’ (lame ass joke, I know).

In all seriousness, friendship > relationship

Now for the big part that I realized: I don’t actually favour relationships (BAAAM!)

Particularly relationships at an early age.

Being a hopeless romantic, I always wish for relationships like this to last forever and ever after,

But more often than not, they don’t.

Because as we grow older, our interests may change, we will meet new people and make new friends, priorities change – we change.

Which is not necessarily a bad thing. Honestly, what would life be if we didn’t change? Would we really want to be stuck in our 15 year old mind set when we’re 20? I wouldn’t, unless my 15 year old self had her life figured out which she clearly hadn’t.

Changing doesn’t necessarily break the relationship – it’s just that we don’t change in the same way. We stop fighting for the same goals or we finally realise that we’ve had different aspirations all along and that makes us rethink the possibilities of being happy together in the future.

So when is it good to have a relationship then, if not early?

Most people (or Muslims, to be more precise) will probably know the answer to this – after marriage. The ideal way to have a relationship is to not have it at all unless it is in the form of marriage.

A lot of people don’t necessarily go for that route, but instead seek their partners beforehand.

Honestly, some people are lucky to find their soulmates at an early age and for those who have found them and are already sure of your choice, good on you! I hope it lasts J

For other people who aren’t in a relationship yet, I always feel it’s best to get into one when you’re ready and not when you’re lonely.

I take relationships very seriously and using someone just to fill a void but to not actually have the niah to take it to the next level i.e. marriage is a big turn off for me.

To be continued -- Effort & Consistency;